Pride does not wish to owe and vanity does not wish to pay. --Francois de la Rochefoucauld

So until this past weekend, this has been my skin care regimen:

 $8.49 at Walgreens (or even cheaper if you get the generic brand from Wal-Mart).

Some of you are thinking, "yeah, so?"  and some of you are thinking "that's ALL????!!!!"

I'm more with the "yeah, so?" club.  I really haven't given this a shred of thought up until now.  I mean, I brush and floss my teeth each night and wash my face.  Isn't that enough, for crying out loud?  All of these night creams and the like just seem so foreign to me, and I wouldn't even know where to start.  And how 'bout the prices on those babies, huh? 

Well, I just so happened to be in need of some makeup, and my friend was hosting a BeautiControl party, which is the brand of makeup I use.  AND she was offering a 25% discount on purchases. 

Well, I am vehemently opposed to these types of parties, and have managed to boycott them for the past several years.  But I found it difficult to pass up that 25% discount.  I know.  Total hypocrite.  It's shameful, really.  But desperate times call for desperate measures....and all that stuff.

So...


I found myself to be the ONLY lady at this party who doesn't do a skin-care regimen.  I was the "elephant in the room," so to speak, and of course, the peer pressure was too great.  Not only did I come home with $86 worth of skin-care products, I am now in line to host one of these dreaded parties.  Because that was the only way I was walking out with the aforementioned products for $86.  Otherwise, they would have cost me twice as much.

How ridiculous is that?

Did I mention that I was the model for the party and got to try out the products and have my makeup done?  And I won the drawing for the Lamp Berger?

Unbelievably ridiculous.

After one day, I asked Handy Daddy if I look 10 years younger.  He said, "You better not, because you're already 10 years younger than me and I don't want to look like a pedophile."  At least that's what I think he said.  Sometimes I hear words coming out of his mouth that are entirely different than what he's actually saying.  I do that.

I don't know, I just never really worried about this stuff.  Other than being the oldest child in my family, I've somehow been younger than everyone else who surrounds me.  I've always been the youngest person wherever I worked, the youngest person in my Bible study, the youngest person in my group of friends.  Well, I actually have one friend who is a year younger, but she's been married longer and has more kids than me, so she has more experience being a grown-up than I do.

I love being the youngest, because it gives me an opportunity to be treated like the "baby," which, of course, I never experienced growing up as the oldest of four children.  It's really fun being the baby.  Everyone around you simultaneously wants to be you because you're young, and pities you because you're dumb.  It's flattering to have people want to be like you and it's sometimes nice to be pitied because people want to take care of you.  And I'm all about being taken care of.  That is my love language, people.

But who am I kidding?  I may be the youngest in the group, but I'm in my 30s.  Being the youngest in the group doesn't make me forever young.  And while I don't yet have any [very noticeable] wrinkles, I'd better get on the ball if I want to keep it that way.

The funny thing is I really don't care about that stuff all that much.  I don't give wrinkles or gray hairs much thought.  The thing that worries me is that all these lovely ladies who surround me do (apparently, as I learned this weekend).  I don't want to be the dummy that sits around shriveling while they're all preserving themselves. 

Uh-uh...

I will not be out----er----preserved....