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Monday, September 27, 2010

"Traveling mercies" means something altogether different to me now

So the Fam took off for a long weekend "vacation" to the beach this past Thursday.  We are now home.  Hallelujah!  Here are a few highlights of the trip:

  • As soon as we pulled onto the Interstate, the Bug said, "Mom, are we at vacation yet?"  That was the first of MANY such questions.

  • In all my maternal wisdom, I went to the library when the girls were at Mother's Day Out and picked out books and CDs that their little eyes and ears have yet to see and hear.  I kept them hidden and pulled them out for the trip.  Handy Daddy, impressed with his fine choice of a wife, fist-bumped me on this one.  This kept them busy for about an hour.  The other three hours were spent listening to Tootsie wail to be removed from the car seat, with about a half-hour nap somewhere in there.

  • We stopped at a Denny's for supper on the way to the island.  This could probably be a post in and of itself, so I'll just give you the highlights of this highlight:  Tootsie let out a fart that I'm convinced could go into the record books for the longest fart ever recorded while sitting in a wooden highchair, which of course, enhanced the sound effects of the fart.  Later, The Bug shouted over and over "I just burped!  I just burped!"  I'm like....what in the world??  I specifically recall the doctor twice saying to me "It's a little girl." Apparently, they haven't caught on to that little bit of information yet.

  • The first night was spent with Tootsie wedged between us - her head in my back and her feet in Handy Daddy's back.

  • The second night, when we decided to turn in, we found this:

How is it that they were in the exact same position on two separate nights?  I think they're in cahoots.

  • Tootsie flat-out refused to taste the pop tarts I bought them as an easy vacation "treat" breakfast, but didn't hesitate to eat the seaweed on the beach.

  • The Bug and Handy Daddy were at the pool for several hours and were drying off to go in for lunch.  The Bug apparently forgot she had taken off her floaties, and decided to hop back into the pool.  She made us proud in her attempt to stay afloat, but Handy Daddy had to jump in fully clothed to retrieve her.

  • I do recall the point at the Aquarium when Tootsie stuck her fingers in her throat and gagged.  I don't know how much time elapsed between that point and the point when we finally realized that she had regurgitated her lunch onto the front of her outfit.  I wonder what people thought of me as I happily strolled my baby around sportin' about a fourth cup of banana and red grape chunks.  If I had been wearing sweats, no makeup and a messy ponytail, they probably would've thought I was overwhelmed and felt sorry for me.  But since I had made myself relatively presentable for our little family outing, they probably just thought I was clueless and felt sorry for Tootsie.  Either way, they're wrong.  Because she probably just had an upset tummy from the beach seaweed buffet she had that morning.  So THERE!

  • When we left for the trip home, the Bug asked, "Mom, are we in Louisiana yet?"  Here we go again...

  • On the way home, the Bug asked Handy Daddy if she could get a pet frog.  He said "Uh, let me think about it.  No."  A few minutes later, the Bug says, "Oh, Mom, I got a better idea than a pet frog.  How 'bout I get a pet penguin?"

  • Also on the way home, Handy Daddy was being silly and dancing to the Cars soundtrack (picture the index finger in the air somewhat reminscent of Saturday Night Fever), and the Bug said, "Daddy, you look like a tap dancer."  And he wonders why I look at him like this when he dances

(We've been married so long, I think we're starting to look alike or something).

I'm glad we took the trip, but I am more glad that we're home.  Vacation is exhausting.

Monday, September 20, 2010

The Patriarchs would be proud...

Yet another butchered Bible song -- she's full of 'em.

Traditional lyrics:
Father Abraham had many sons, and many sons had Father Abraham
I am one of them, and so are you
So let's all praise the Lord

The Bug's lyrics:
Father Magel-han had many songs, and many songs had Father Magel-han
I am wonderin', and so are you
So let's all praise the Ward

Thursday, September 9, 2010

Because He first loved Me

Isn't it funny how kids will come up with something out of the blue that just leaves you floored?

Yesterday, as we were loading up and leaving the library after Baby Story Time, the Bug asks me, "Mama, do you know what a Christian is?  A Christian is someone who loves Jesus, and I love Jesus, so I'm a Christian."

Talk about just stop you in your tracks. 

Later in the day, we had this conversation while riding in the car listening to Christmas music of all things (in September) --

The Bug:  "Mama, am I worshiping right now?"
Mama:  "Yes, Baby, if you're singing to Jesus, you're worshiping."
The Bug:  "I am singing to Jesus, Mama.  I love to worship Jesus."

Oh, and two days ago, it went down like this --

The Bug:  "Mama, do you know what makes God sad?  Sin."
Mama:  "That's right.  Do you know what sin is?"
The Bug:  "Yes.  It's something that makes God sad."

I don't know if the Spirit is tugging on her little heart or what -- but that girl is just blowing me away this week.

Oh, sweet Jesus, let it last.  Don't let this innocence fade with the years.  Keep her heart always, Lord.  Show me how to nurture this love she has for You, Lord.  And thank you for this incredible gift.  Amen.

Thursday, September 2, 2010

Hush Little Baby (Don't Say a Word)

No matter how bad my day has been...
no matter how stressed out...
no matter how irritated or aggravated...
no matter how defiant the kids were...
no matter how clingy or needy or high-maintenance they were...

This gets me every time --

A sleeping child.

I could have completely lost my temper, yelled and threatened to get in my car and drive away (which I do regularly -- I know, pathetic, right?)...

I go in their room after they're asleep and my heart melts.  They're so beauiful!  They look like angels (and they really are). 

I really have great kids, but we all know that those days come when all you want is for them to go to sleep so you can just have a minute of peace...

...and then sneak into their room and stare at their peaceful little faces. 

Let me let you in on a little secret....I'm hooked on watching my kids sleep -- and I have the photos to prove it.  Here are some of my faves...

The Bug - 5 1/2 mos
The Bug - 9 mos.

The Bug - 17 mos.
The Bug - 23 mos.

The Bug - 2 yrs.
Tootsie - 2 1/2 mos.

Tootsie - 10 1/2 mos.

The Bug - 4 yrs.Tootsie - 13 1/2 mos.

Tootsie - 14 mos.

Now you all see what I mean?  Any other closet [people who stare at their children while they sleep] out there?

Wednesday, September 1, 2010

Bring it, Probst...

So after several weeks and about 10 or so tries, I have finally succeeded in cooking brown rice in a pot on the stove without scorching the rice at the bottom of the pot.  That's right, I am now, after much trial and error, in possession of the exact formula of rice to water ratio, heat intensity and cook time.  Look out NASA, there's a new kid in town.

Anywho...

My success at cooking one cup of brown rice is quite the self-esteem builder.  I feel like I've finally arrived.  I am now a bonafide grown-up.

Nevermind I'm over 30, been married almost 8 years and have birthed two babies.

You come to my house.  You're hungry.  I can cook you a mean cup of rice. 

Now, really, I guess cooking rice does not equate adulthood.  It really just means I got skillz.  The only problem is, I can only cook one cup.  You see, my formula calls for one cup, and I have no idea if it would work with multiple cups.  I mean, I'd have to tinker with the aforementioned rice to water ratio, heat intensity and cook time.  And I don't have several more weeks for that.  I think it would just be quicker to cook one cup of rice over and over until I had enough. 

Of course, maybe I could make the time for this experiment, because it could actually pay off in the long run.  I mean, what if I got called up to go on Survivor?  That's all they eat on that show.  If I could cook more than one cup of rice to the absolute perfection I've attained with the one cup, my skillz would be invaluable...or worth $1 million...same difference.

Speaking of Survivor, the countdown starts today.  Two more weeks people. 

Outwit....outlast....outplay.  I'm all about it, baby.

That's it -- I'm goin' cook some rice.